Lonely Heart
20/10/98-21/10/98
20 October 1998 - LONELY HEART
I am fed up with living this life alone, and have decided to get myself a woman. My ad in the paper has already paid off - last night I went on a date with a lovely zoo keeper called Mrs Cheeky. She was a lot of fun, but died shortly after the second course, which was a shame.
I didn't want to cause a fuss, though, so I just got up and left the restaurant via the toilet window. But I can't get Mrs Cheeky out of my mind...
21 October 1998 - LONELY HEART
I went on another date last night, but I don't think I made a very good impression. The lady was a highly regarded lawyer from Nice, who was very properly spoken.
I don't think she took very kindly to me pretending I was at a pantomime in my head - particularly as we were at the cinema watching Saving Private Ryan. My repeated shouts of "He's behind you", and constant booing and hissing became too much for her after an hour, and she left without saying goodbye. In fact, she cut my foot off.
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