13 September 1997 - BLUE PETER
I've got a new job now as a presenter on the childrens' programme Blue Peter. I had to meet my fellow presenters in the pub last night. Unfortunately, I got so drunk that I've forgotten their names. There was one bloke with stupid teeth, another bloke with what what looked like a joke nose, some Scottish bird, and another bird with a speech defect.
Neither of the birds were stunners, but they were several times better than either Leslie Judd or Michael Sundin.
17 September 1997 - BLUE PETER
I don't think I'll be presenting Blue Peter for much longer. During last night's show I accidentally referred to the producer's club foot on screen, and when the show finished he challenged me to a fight in the car park.
I declined, but then he started running at me swinging a length of flex. Fortunately, because of his massive swollen foot, he couldn't run very fast, and I was able to get away and hide in a lighting rig.