The Man With A Long Chin's Diary


In The Nick


3 February 1994 - IN THE NICK

"Clarkuss" and I were refused bail last night, and swiftly sent to the county gaol. It's awful in here; we've already had our cupboards pinched by the lags.

One of the screws is alright. His name is Stevens, and he walks just like a horse.

4 February 1994 - IN THE NICK

It's rough here in jail. We were taken to the guv'nor last night and made to swallow strips of bark whilst he sung and stamped his big hairy feet.

Stevens the screw has been showing us some of the 12 escape hatches he has built.

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