18 July 1995 - NEWSPAPER
Jacob has rented out all his dad's masks, and with the money we've decided to publish a newspaper.
We're calling it The Daily Accuser. The idea is the paper is littered with little comment boxes where we accuse famous people of stuff.
Like in the first edition we accuse Marco Polo of being a magic lion.
25 July 1995 - NEWSPAPER
Further scandal beset our fledgling newspaper yesterday, when our TV reviewer, Henny Auld-Irons, was caught de-scaling the giant kettle in Trafalgar Square.
She told police that her brain was being controlled by space sprats. When the police attempted to handcuff her, she began coughing up roe. The stench was so overwhelming, the officers were forced to put bins on their heads.