17 March 1997 - STAGE MAGICIAN
I've been having a rest, but I'm back with details of my new job. For the last week or so I've been a stage magician!
I plan to have the most innovative act on the circuit. I open the show by making a dog come out of a hoover. It's a trade secret, but I don't mind telling you that the dog is actually very small - and the hoover is twenty feet wide!
After this, I pour a load of snow into the back of a television.
18 March 1997 - STAGE MAGICIAN
I've been refining my magic act to include some amazing new tricks.
Audiences are likely to be astounded when I make a couple of doves fly into a bridge. How do I do it? Simple: the birds are drunk! I now close the show with my biggest trick yet - I make the audience disappear. I bet you're wondering how I pull that one off. Well, I simply pull a lever and the audience drop 30 feet through a trap door. They'll have absolutely no idea where they've gone!