The Man With A Long Chin's Diary


Man And Gretl


9 June 1998 - MAN AND GRETL

It's awful being lost in the woods – it's full of strange creatures, like squirrels and that, which really scare me. My cousin, Gretl, and I thought our salvation was at hand last night when we came across what we assumed to be a road.

Unfortunately, when Gretl pointed out that the tarmac was flowing, we realised that it was in fact a river. Still, we passed a few moments by trying to catch a lobster, but when we succeeded it turned out to be a carrier bag wrapped around a branch.

10 June 1998 - MAN AND GRETL

Yesterday my cousin, Gretl, and I were lost in the woods and today things couldn't be any better - we're being looked after by a kindly old, green-faced woman with a hooked nose, who is letting us stay in her house until we remember where we live.

It's a bit weird here, though. I think the house is made out of sweets, but they've all gone rotten, so it's a bit difficult to be sure. Also, the woman keeps laughing at a book she's reading called "How To Cool And Eat Children, By Me, The Witch". And she smells bad.

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