The Man With A Long Chin's Diary


Toy Designer


29 March 1997 - TOY DESIGNER

I've been designing a range of pocket money toys for poor children. The toys will all be priced at 97p and feature colourful styling.

The first toy is "The Revolting Lump". I scooped a load of matter out of my bathroom plughole, and thought what a wonderful toy it'd make. We have begun mass-producing "Revolting Lumps" in a forty-foot replica of my sink. I also designed "Young Malcolm". It's basically a couple of pegs on a chain.

1 April 1997 - TOY DESIGNER

We've extended our range of Only Fools and Horses action figures to include minor characters.

You'll soon be able to get hold of Boycey (with "Chest-Concealed Rocket Launcher"), Trigger (with "Pivoting Wrist Action"), and Del-Boy's bird, whatever her name is. We're also producing a playset replica of Del-Boy's flat, which is stuffed with special features, and comes packaged with an exclusive figure of a slightly younger Del-Boy.

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