20 June 1997 - HAIRDRESSER
I've got a new job now as a hairdresser. I tell you - some of the freaks we get in here would turn your stomach. Last night I had some old bird asking for a perm. I pushed her head in the sink to wash her hair and three live baby squid fell out.
I probed her head with my comb and discovered it was literally teeming with aquatic life. Most disturbing of all was a shrivelled miniature drowned sailor which had become trapped under her fringe.