Mega Games - Broken PlayStation
27 December 1997
Merry foetus! I hope you had a really smashing Christmas time, and an even better Boxing time. I love boxing - which probably explains why I box in my mind's eye.
Just before Christmas I rang a shop pretending to be a parent concerned that he had broken his child's main Christmas gift. It was, of course, another of my hilarious ruses! The name of the shop has been changed to protect me from getting into trouble.
"MEGA GAMES", NORTH WEST
US: Afternoon. My wife and I bought a PlayStation for our son for Christmas, and we thought we'd try it out before we gave it to him, but it's faulty.
MG: Did you buy it off us?
US: We got it in the market. Do you do fixing?
MG: Yeah, but it's obviously gonna cost you if you didn't buy it from us. Did you get a receipt?
US: We didn't get a receipt. The man who sold it to us said he'd remember our faces, but when we took it back there was a different man there, who denied the other man existed, and called us liars.
MG: That sounds bad. Look, if you bring it in we'll take a look at it, but I can't promise anything.
US: Actually, I think it's probably something I could do myself.
US: You see, all that's happened is that the back panel has sort of come away from the actual PlayStation. There are about three wires that are hanging loose, and there's this big blob of glue holding them together.
MG: Sounds like it's had it, mate.
US: I don't think it's broken for real, I mean - it still plays games. It just gets very hot very quickly. It's working all right at the moment. I've got it on in the kitchen.
MG: I'd scrap it, mate. What did it cost you?
US: Thirty seven pounds.
MG: For a PlayStation? They must have ripped it off from somewhere.
US: Oh - could you hang on a second?
(THERE IS A LONG PAUSE. SWEARING AND THE SOUND OF BREAKING WOOD IS HEARD FROM OUR END OF THE PHONE.)
US: Hello, are you still there?
MG: Yeah, but I gotta go. What happened just then?
US: The PlayStation set fire to one of the teatowels. I think I might throw it away now.
MG: That's probably a good idea.
US: Ok. Bye then. Happy birthday.
MG: Happ... what?
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