The Digitiser Christmas Pant-oh

2000 - The Wizard Of Oz: Part 2

EXT. EMERALD CITY

DOROTHY: Oh, Toto, look what's happened to the Emerald City: it's been wrecked!

TINMAN: Hello, Dorothy.

DOROTHY: Tinman! What happened here?

TINMAN: After you left, we all decided that the Emerald City was rubbish, and so we got drunk and went on a rampage.

DOROTHY: I can't believe you'd do that.

TINMAN: Well, I was really drunk. Also, the Scarecrow dared me to write "Dorothy is a ponce" on that wall.


EXT. EMERALD CITY

DOROTHY: Oh, Toto, if only the Wizard Of Oz was here - he'd change everything back to normal, and get us home.

TINMAN: Actually, we have a new wizard now, Dorothy. Here he is!

DOROTY: But I don't understand... it's just a fluffy pencil case sellotaped to a barrel, with a couple of grapes nailed on for his eyes, and two lengths of hose for his arms.

TINMAN: Ssssh! He's not deaf, you know.


EXT. EMERALD CITY

DOROTHY: So, Cowardly Lion, what are you going to ask the Wizard for this time?

LION: Um... a light bulb.

DOROTHY: Is that it?

LION: Er... what do you think I should ask him for?

DOROTHY: What do you want the most?

LION: Well, I really do need a bulb. Only, I can't read my pamphlets in bed without one.


EXT. EMERALD CITY

DOROTHY: What are you going ask the Wizard for, Tinman?

TINMAN: A kiss!

DOROTHY: Er... I don't think he'll give you one of those.

TINMAN: Well he did the other night.

DOROTHY: Er...

TINMAN: Hey, there's nothing wrong with that. I'm not even real. C'mere, you!

DOROTHY: Don't touch me.


EXT. EMERALD CITY

DOROTHY: Well, anyway, I'm going to have to back to Kansas now.

TINMAN: Why?

DOROTHY: I just am.

TINMAN: But I haven't even shown you my Scalextric yet.

DOROTHY: Your Scalextric?

TINMAN: Well, alright. It's not a real Scalextric. It's a train set. But it's still pretty cool!


More pant-ohs to read with your eyes: here

1995 - DAVID BELT AND THE SEVEN DWARVES

1997 - BABES IN THE WOOD

1999 - SNOW BROWN & THE SEVEN SPORKS

Do you know of any important moments from the annals of Digi history that have been omitted? If so, then mail me (superpage58@gmail.com) right now, man. Credit will be duly given for anything that gets put up.

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